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Two news items got me to thinking about rich man’s justice: The federal takeover of the Michael Vick dogfighting investigation, and Paris Hilton’s probably short-lived release from jail.

I have no idea what Los Angeles County Sheriff Lee Baca was thinking in allowing Hilton’s transfer to house arrest — for “medical reasons,” which the entertainment sites were saying was either a severe rash or a near-breakdown — after she spent only three days in jail.

And I have no idea what Virginia Commonwealth Attorney Gerald G. Poindexter was thinking in criticizing the federal government’s takeover of the Vick investigation, when he’s the one who prevented a search warrant taken out by local authorities from being executed.

What I do know is it’s nice to see that a little public backlash against otherwise popular celebrities knock some of the rust off the wheels of justice.

Let’s start with Hilton. I like the tone set by Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer, who made it plain in sentencing Hilton that house arrest was out of the question.

I agree that the 45-day sentence she received was stiff, leaning toward harsh. But she did manage to get caught driving after suspension not once, but twice, which to me definitely constitutes flouting the law (regardless of what her publicist might have told her; although, if you’re dumb enough to take legal advice from your publicist, you deserve whatever happens to you). And if you actively show disdain for the rule of law, it’s my opinion that you deserve to feel the brunt of it.

[Aside: Flout is another one of those words people insist upon substituting with the wrong word, flaunt, to the point where even reputable dictionaries will list one of the definitions of flaunt as "to treat with disdain".]

And it strikes me as interesting that weeks before she reported to jail, her sentence was already reduced to 23 days, thanks to “good behavior” rules. (I would have thought you needed to exhibit good behavior prior to getting credit for it; and given Hilton’s public behavior, plus her antics on “The Simple Life,” assuming model behavior from her is foolish.)

It’s even more interesting to me that by reporting to jail a half-hour before midnight Sunday, and leaving at 2 a.m. Thursday, Hilton gets credit for serving five whole days in jail.

I’ll even accept that due to overcrowding, as a rule nonviolent offenders in Los Angeles County general serve only 10 percent of their sentences, and that’s effectively what Hilton served.

Here’s what I can’t figure: Rich, pretty white girl gets jammed on drunken driving charge. Rich, pretty white girl gets minimum sentence. Rich, pretty white girl gets caught driving after suspension. Rich, pretty white girl effectively gets warned not to do it again, while everyone else would be summonsed and possibly put on a probation hold. Then, rich, pretty white girl gets caught a second time driving after suspension and finally has to face a judge.

Meanwhile, mother of rich, pretty white girl makes mockery of court proceeding inside and outside chambers. Backlash begins and rich, pretty white girl seems to begin to understand that being rich, pretty and white doesn’t get you over with middle-class America when it looks like you think you’re better than they are. A semblance of sincerity and responsibility arises. You check yourself into prison ahead of time.

And then you rub the prison-issue soap really hard on your ass so you can get a rash, because even in protective lockdown, the joint is a major drag. And the sheriff, who apparently isn’t paying any attention at all — not to the prosecutor’s hard line, not to the judge’s hard line, not to his own political survival — puts her in the same home confinement scheme that was specifically labeled verboten by all the other law enforcement involved.

Hell, even total imbeciles like Paris and Kathy Hilton can figure out that hard line and public sentiments would turn that decision into a firestorm.

So Hilton is ordered back to the courtroom by the same judge who sent her to jail and the district attorney is calling for the sheriff to be held in contempt. I don’t think what he did was contemptuous — he probably makes dozens of similar decisions every day with total impunity — but what he did was D - U - M stupid. We’ll know more tomorrow.

Then you have the attorney general for Virginia, Poindexter, trying to convert his sycophantic inaction into a case of the federal government wanting to harass a popular black man.

Wrong, Poindexter. The problem here is that had the investigation been left to you, two things clearly would have happened: Vick’s property would never have been searched, and what is increasingly looking like a major interstate crime ring would barely have been scratched by any charges you eventually leveled.

Let’s not forget that the discovery of several injured dogs and other possible evidence of dog fighting at a home owned by Vick in Virginia wasn’t originally driven by allegations of dog fighting: It was a drug raid that turned up the injured dogs, blood-stained carpet and veterinary tools often associated with dog fighting.

Now, it’s entirely likely that many of the informants in this case — themselves admittedly involved in dog fighting — may be attempting to drag Vick into it; it may well be that Vick is totally innocent.

But the problem is that the investigation was going nowhere fast and it certainly wasn’t because there was a lack of leads, questions about whether a crime had occurred or difficulty obtaining resources. The original raid on Vick’s (now former) Virgina house was on April 25. Since then, no arrests, no warrants executed, no statements from Poindexter’s office except that they were investigating the matter.

So, to clear up any confusion Poindexter may be having over why the Department of Agriculture and US Attorney may be interested in this case: There are extensive allegations in this case that Vick may have participated in dog fights staged in several states. The kennel run at Vick’s former Virginia home, and which bore Vick’s imprimatur, sold dogs across state lines, making them subject to a variety of federal laws and regulations, including 9CFR, which also clearly requires some minimum standards of care from breeders such as Vick’s operation.

It may well be that Poindexter is right about Vick getting some extra attention because he’s a high-profile name. But Poindexter’s attempts to be dismissive about the scope of the problem belies the direct statements of dozens of people claiming to be part of an illegal enterprise, as well as the statements of several other southern NFL players, who see dog fighting as culturally important and criminally irrelevant — much as Poindexter seems to be treating the matter.

This is clearly a case not of the federal government overstepping its bounds, but of the same sort of thinking that led to Jim Crow: We’ll do only that which is legally required, because down here in the South, we have our own cultural values and our own way of going about things that doesn’t jive with what Northerners think.

If anything, I think it takes courage for the feds to step in here, if not at least to shine some light on what looks to me like a cover-up by Virginia’s top law enforcement officer.